http://brandon-gilbert.blogspot.com/2009/01/how-to-get-people-to-listen-to-you.h

Question

http://brandon-gilbert.blogspot.com/2009/01/how-to-get-people-to-listen-to-you.html This blogger provides a number of tips for better listening. Do you agree with him? Would you “listen” to him? What helped or prevented you in listening to what he has to say? How can we help people to “listen” to us in other forms of communication beyond face-to-face interaction, such as writing, texting, or talking on the phone? Do you agree with his premise that becoming a good listener will cause people to listen to you? Why or why not?

Explanation / Answer

This blog explains the importance of meta language in communication. Using appropriate cue words and paraphrasing will make you seem like a good listener. Listening is an important ingredient in making meaningful conversation. The author explains the importance of gesture appropriate to the content of the communication. It is very important to make sure that the communication should not be boring. It should be crisp, to the point flavored with a little of humor. When a listener's attention is broken, the person should take charge to bring back his attention to the topic. Sometimes temporary emotional states may prevent people from listening. But here the person does'nt have a control over the temporary emotional states of the listener. It is better to have an empathy and understanding of the listener rather than forcing him to listen. It is better to wait until these emotions subside so that the communication can be carried out effectively. Points should be restated to bring back the listener to his attention. Rephrasing the sentences appropriate to the emotional state of the listener at times will help the speaker to bring back the focus of the listener. The blog explains some scenarios which can be used to understand when the listener is lying. This points to the importance of nonverbal behavior in understanding the deception in listener. People tend to indulge in selective hearing and a speaker should be careful about this. As listening is a tiring activity, people focus on certain words which have more personal meaning to them. This may interfere with the communication.So, it is better to avoid a lot of negative words like “don't” “can't” etc. Positive language has a powerful effect in persuading people. Hence, it is always better to be honest and express your opinions without hurting the feeling of the listener. The author concludes by saying the importance of acknowledging the listener and conveying this information properly to him.

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